I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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