god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize