When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
Randomize
