that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
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