woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
nutella sex= disaster
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
