HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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