Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
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