what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
Michael Bay diarrhea
sarcasm needs its own font
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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