But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
