I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Just pee around me
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Randomize
