why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Randomize
