Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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