so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
Randomize
