Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Lo siento on account of my penis...
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
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