...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
