I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Randomize
