Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
