I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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