was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
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