I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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