Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Randomize
