Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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