I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
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