Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
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