You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Four minutes until I can fart!
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Randomize
