I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
PS: I just woke up from my shower
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
