You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
