Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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