You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Randomize