i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
