I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
Go christen that room with your naked body.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
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