didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Randomize
