Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
