Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
I checked into jail on foursquare
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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