covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
you made out with another girl for some wings
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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