What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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