Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
I think we might need a safe word for this...
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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