is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
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