Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
