I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Randomize
