Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Randomize
