At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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