He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
