They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
