you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Randomize
