New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
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