So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
