my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
