He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Randomize
