Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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